Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship

Many women and men live with domestic violence because they feel ashamed, or may not know where to go for help. If you are in an abusive relationship, your partner’s behavior is unacceptable, and it may even be criminal. Domestic abuse covers a range of behaviors, from yelling and hitting objects (walls), to slapping and beating.

Every person deserves to be free of abuse and live a peaceful life. Few people leave domestic violence situations without the help of others, because abusive people establish control over so many parts of their partners’ lives.

Center for Domestic Peace is here to help you make the transition to a peaceful life, free of abuse.


SUPERIORITY: The primary characteristics of an abusers.

  • Do they tell you what to do?
  • Make most of the decisions?
  • Do all the talking?
  • Blame you?
  • Are critical of you?
  • Give you an ‘allowance’?
  • Tell you what to wear?

POSSESSIVENESS: They think they own their victim, even after separation.

  • Are they jealous & possessive?
  • Do they check up on you?
  • Accuse you of cheating?
  • Want you all to themselves?
  • Put down your friends and family?
  • Scare you?
  • Make you afraid of their reactions?
  • Pressure you to have sex whether you want to or not?

UNEQUAL: Have rigid and unequal gender role expectations.

  • Expects females to do the shopping, cooking and cleaning.
  • Expects males to be tough and strong.
  • Expects females to be inferior and submissive.
  • Expects females to obey.
  • Expects males to be the king of the household.


Has your partner or ex-partner ever…
➤ Slapped, hit or shoved you?
➤ Held you down or shaken you?
➤ Locked you out of the house?
➤ Thrown, broken, or burned things?
➤ Acted very jealous, accused you of having an affair or dressing to attract a new partner?
➤ Yelled at you, or told you that you were crazy?
➤ Thrown, hit, or destroyed objects close to you?
➤ Humiliated or belittled you in private or public?
➤ Made all the decisions, treated you like a servant or acted like the master of the castle?
➤ Isolated you by controlling what you do, who you see and talk to, or where you go?
➤ Used your children to make you feel guilty or used visitation as a way to harass you?
➤ Tried to keep you from getting or keeping a job?
➤ Given you an allowance instead of sharing money?
➤ Not allowed you to handle your own money, open a bank account, or apply for credit cards?
➤ Threatened to hurt or kill you if you didn’t follow his or her orders?
➤ Threatened to call Child Protective Services (CPS) and report you as an unfit parent?
➤ Threatened to call Immigration and have them deport you?
➤ Pressured or forced you to have sex when you didn’t want to?

Many of these behaviors are illegal. If you want it to stop, you can get help.
You don’t need to struggle or suffer alone.

24-Hour Hotline /Linea de apoyo: 415-924-6616

M-F 9am – 5pm:
(415) 457-6760 (ManKind Program for men who want to end their abusive behavior)

(415) 457-6760 (WomanKind Program for women who want to end their abusive behavior)



Here is a link to the 8 types of abuse and definitions: PEEVSSSS

For a complete list of resources C4DP has, please visit this page!